The New “Sexy” Halloween costumes of 2014

Another year, another round of the most commonplace-household-objects-turned-sexual in women’s Halloween costumes. Each year, the selections get more absurd—from fruits to deep-ocean animals to childhood toys, there are Halloween costumes that will stop you from ever looking at Big Bird in the same way again. (And don’t even get me started on the fully clothed male versions of the same costumes.) Of course, I’m against judging women for whatever costume they choose to wear, especially given the pressure for women to look hot on Halloween. But I’m totally fine with judging companies for thinking these are desirable, sensual costumes that anyone could really feel sexy in. So instead of taking this opportunity to rant about double standards, let’s just bask in the hilarity of unbelievably unsexy “sexy” Halloween costumes. 1. Adult Hamburger Costume If you thought Paris Hilton eating a hamburger while washing a car was sexy, here’s a whole new level of hot. …

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